Wednesday, March 2, 2011

What? Give up MY RIGHTS?!!!

This was one of those mornings when I had a wrestling match with God.  

Well, let's just get honest here...  This is not easy...

You see, our church is going through a really hard time right now.  It's a thing that is so deeply dividing our church that our pastor has resigned in hopes of helping to bring healing to the congregation.  My heart is so grieved.  What is right?  What is fact?  What has been blown out of proportion?  Many stories are circulating - not only inside our church, but also in the community.   I love my church.  What does God want ME to do? 

Well, I guess this is where the whole "give up my rights" thing comes into play.  You see, I am not a person who likes confrontation.  My husband says I am an expert at "Ostrich Philosophy."  It is so much easier just to stick my head in the sand and hope the problem will resolve itself without any intervention from me! 

So, I can either run from this problem - run to another church, or just quit going to church for awhile.  Or I can give up my rights to taking the easy way out, and "stay the course" no matter how rough the sailing is.  When I look at it that way, it seems like either I can be part of the problem or part of the solution.  No half-way involvement.  Either in, or out.

Dr. J.H.Jowett says, "We never pass into any spiritual inheritance through the delightful exercises of a picnic, but always through the grim contentions of the battlefield."   This morning the battlefield was in my mind,  about my perceived rights to being free of discomfort.   I guess I'm giving up my rights to sit on the sidelines as a civilian, and ready to put on the garb of a soldier. 


Peggy said...

Just to let you know I noticed and appreciate you sharing your heart with strangers. Already I feel that we are not strangers, but friends and, more importantly, sisters in Christ.

Shirley said...

This is probably one of the hardest things in life is seeing our church divided. There is no way to keep folks from getting hurt! I will be praying for you, I am sure you will make the right decision!

Renee said...

It is so hard to see a church in conflict, especially one you are deeply connected to. I don't like conflict either. Praying you find peace in your answer. God bless.

Judy said...

Hi Esther,

You go girl! Fight the good fight of faith. The bible says we are to put on the whole armor of God and that our weapons are not carnal but mighty in power to demolish strongholds. Be prayerful and be very courageous, and do what God would have you to do! Amen!


Ginger~~Enchanting Cottage said...

It's so sad when this kinda of thing happens at churches,stay strong.
God Bless,

Joan said...

It isn't an easy thing when a church is divided. However, as Judy said - stand firm, put on that armor and realize who the enemy is. He is out to seek and destroy and would like nothing more than to destroy a church.

sarah said...'re in a tough place....I don't like confrontation either....but maybe if you just hang in...things will sort themselves out..Stay strong okay....

MTJ said...

Hi Esther Joy,

This is my first visit to your blog and though I'm not a part of the conflict you speak of, I realize how damaging conflict can be. I think it is good to want to regain the peace and harmony that seems to have been take away, but as you recognize, spiritual effort is required.

I will be praying for you and those in your church; that the peace of God and humility of spirit once again rest with each of you.

Blessings and peace.


Charlotte said...

Being a pastor's wife for so many years, I've seen and heard a lot of this kind of thing. I am like you. I do not like confrontation. I am more of the ostrich variety. I know how hard it is to know what to do in this kind of situation. I think it is probably best to stay where you are and maybe time will sort out many of the questions you have. I know you are praying about it a lot, and that is probably the best thing you can do right now. I am joining you in praying about this situation that God will show you the way he wants you and the church to go.
Blessings and prayers,

Vintagesouthernlife said...

I'm sorry your going through this. I don't like confrontation either. Praying for strength for you and this situation.

ILoveMyDogandMy Music said...

I don't like confrontation either, but I've found that if I do take my stand early and quickly, then I feel at peace. Of course, it takes me some time to come to a decision as to what I might do in any given situation. I weigh all sides, then I act.

Loren said...


Having been through VERY difficult church situations I completely understand your pain. It is by far, one of the the worst hurts one can experience. Keep your eyes on Jesus, your ear inclined to HIM and HIS Word. He really will direct your path ~ one day at a time.

Will be praying for you and your church body.

Crystal Mary said...

Hello Esther, Your name is lovely.. and suits you.
As I typed away here I was knocked off-line, which proves to me, your church is up against some evil stuff.
As I read, the verse below came to me.
"For we wrestle not against flesh and blood but against principalies powers and rulers in high places."
Ephesians 6:12
You will know what you are to do..
I myself would remain and pray all the time I was inside. I would also walk around the perimeter of the building and pray..
Have you read Smiths Wigglesworth? He was an English pastor from the 19th century..with an amazing faith.
Many Blessings CM from Queensland, OZ.

Clif said...

I'm just going to agree with what my wife, Charlotte said and not repeat her words. I also appreciate what others said, especially my friend, Loren. God bless you as you live for Him.

Esther Joy said...

To everyone that posted a comment, I want to thank each one of you for your encouraging words. They have helped me so much. Today was our pastors last day. It was sad but amazing to see how God is working in spite of the situation. We had 22 baptisms, and several went forward for salvation or joining the church. It was a confirmation to me that this is God's church, and "the gates of hell will not prevail against it!"
All of you have blessed me. Thank you for your prayers!

Judy said...

Hi Esther,

Thanks so much for leaving a message on my photography blog! And thanks for praying for me.


Sheila Rather said...

Thank you so much for your post! Paul and I have struggled with this too. It seems that all the bad comments and junk is drowning out the positive stuff and lets face it...the truth. It is really sad actually. But, I could go on and on about all that:) We can never go wrong if we are on the side of rightousness, truthfulness and the building up of God`s people instead of the tearing down of those things that God holds dear. You make an amazing soldier:)